It must be even more frustrating for these patient family and friends that my complaining is often followed by the continuation of these same patterns. My social life has gotten to the point of "double booking" (as someone on my calendar put it last night) in which I stop by one social function on the way to another; which is then followed by hanging out late night somewhere else. (Mom and Dad, don't fret I don't really do this on "school nights.") To all of those friends and family: Sorry. AND I'm on a great roll today so the complaining will stop. At least for today. I think I'll even stay in tonight!
(By the way, I'm not procrastinating by writing on my blog right now; I'm on my way to a meeting and really can't start something new in this little time).
For all of the bad reasons for going out, it has also been pretty fabulous. As a result of being so social, I have started to think about the relationships in my life now. I've been blessed with forming new relationships through a long string of connections in my little city and little community. The same guy who mentioned "double booking" asked how I have such an extensive network (he probably didn't expect the long-winded story about how I met all of these people. Expect long winded from now on, kid.)
Additionally, I've been remembering people from other points in my life. My trip to Nashville highlighted the connections from different phases; I visited with high school friends, my sister and family friends, a college pal, and an Outward Bound friend. Lately, thanks to Facebook and other shenanigans, I've gotten in touch with Vacamas folks and people from the primitive community. I've reconnected with many "lost"aquaintances.
I wonder if my current friends will later become those from my "Asheville phase" of life. Or, I wonder if they will be lifelong friends. Lifelong friends are like players on an "all-star" team. For instance, although being "Colby friends," Sponge and his family are also on my team. Of course I want all the folks to be on this team, but we lose each other.
There's a great quote by Lois Cheney that I think speaks to the value of making those connections in the first place. We read it at the end on Outward Bound courses sometimes. It's a bit long, but it elucidates my thoughts so well.
I'm offering it to you who are a bit or piece of my life:
Bits and pieces,
Bits and pieces.
People, people important to you, people unimportant to you, cross your life, touch it with love and carelessness and move on. There are people who leave you and you breathe a sigh of relief and wonder why you ever came into contact with them. There are people who leave you and you breathe a sigh of remorse and wonder why they had to go away and leave such a gaping hole. Children leave parents; friends leave friends. Acquaintances move on, people change houses. People grow apart. Enemies hate and move on. Friends love and move on. You think on the many who have moved into your hazy memory. You look on those at present and wonder.
I believe in a master plan in lives moving people in and out of each other’s lives, and each leaves a mark on the other. You find you are made up of bits and pieces of all who ever touched your life, and you are more because of it, and you would be less if they had not touched you.
Hope that you accept the bits and pieces in humility and wonder, and never question, and never regret.
Bits and pieces,
Bits and pieces.
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1 comment:
I, for one, understand the ebb and the flow of human relationships. I'm grateful for the bits and pieces that I have gathered of certain people, and I greatly distrust bits and pieces left by others. Sometimes, I actually do not want more than that of people. A bit of wisdom here, a piece of a heart there. It's beautiful and heart-wrenching at the same time. I've learned in the last year that sometimes it does not matter at all who will have longevity, even though my heart tells me that people should WANT to stick around and have meaning in each others' lives. Sometimes a bit or a piece is all that we are supposed to have of each other. Sometimes, the bits and pieces are dragged out and you wonder why they are even still there. I don't know. I do know, however, that all of life depends on context. I think frequently of the yin yang symbol and how context defines life. Some of the bits and pieces left to me have torn me apart, and some have elevated me and made me better. Everything depends on the context in which it happens. The bit of my father left in me can be great or it can be evil. I get to choose. Glad we can share a small part of this crazy ass journey together. I hope the bit or piece I've left behind has some meaning if nothing else. There. Now I'll step off of my philosopher's stone. Bits and pieces has always held great meaning to me.
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